Said a crotchety man from East Leicester,
"My clothes always prickle and peicester.
"My life would be jamois
"In slacks made of chamois,
"Instead of this cheap polyeicester!"

Based on the suggestion: "Said a crotchety"

A boy of Italian descent
Made a ball out of rubber cement
Which he threw from the tower
Of Pisa with power
So great it bounced down in Tashkent.

Based on the suggestion: "A boy of Italian descent"

"You're a dumb, ugly, backwater zero!"
Taunted school chums of poor Agnew (Spiro).
But he gave them cuisine
From the Greek street-food scene,
And his sobriquet's now "Small-Town Gyro!"

Based on the suggestion: "small-town gyro"

A doula who came from Missoula
Made a YouTube on "prepartum hula."
Her Hip-Rolling Spiral
Immediately went viral,
And now the gal's rolling in moolah.

Based on the suggestion: "doula"

Doula: n. A woman who is trained to provide support to women and their families during pregnancy, childbirth and the period of time following the birth.

Here's a practical joke that a LARPer
Can play on their friend who's a harper:
Tune her strings each to A,
Then invite her to play
At the Elvenqueen's feast (and then scarper!)

Based on the suggestion: "harp"

LARP stands for Live Action Role-Playing [Game].  LARPers tend to dress in costume and participate in historical recreations or fantasy situations.

And, in case it's not clear from context, "to scarper" means "to flee."

If your purple prose makes folks abhor you,
I have just the right drug to restore you!
You need a depressant,
An "anti-expressant,"
And my patent Prozaic will cure you!

Based on the suggestion: "prosaic as a pun on Prozac"

Some might think me a simple fond Jew
When I tell them I lust for fondue.
But my biblical scrolls
Aren't written in gold...
"Melted cheese" is my torah's font hue.

Based on the suggestion: "fondue"